Sometimes being a military wife is just plain hard.. Don't get me wrong, I love the lifestyle. The constant moving is perfect for me, as I tend to get bored pretty easily.. But with the constant moving, brings the constant feeling of loneliness. It's so hard for me to make friends the older I get! I've always been a girl's girl (although for the past few years I've been hanging out with 90% dudes!) and sometimes I just miss having that close girlfriend bond. I know I've only been in Virginia for 4 months and it's pretty great I have already met a great group of girls, but I have yet to create that close girlfriend bond with someone. The one to go shopping with, have lunch dates with, tell deep dark secrets to (well not that I have any. But If I did!). Growing up in the same house all of my life gave me the steadiness of always being surrounded by great friends. I was always hanging out with someone whether it was my cousins who lived next door or my neighbors down the street. Now in my adult life, I find myself hanging out with my dog, and that's it! How pathetic! Every time I watch an episode of The King of Queens, it's like looking in a mirror. Carrie and Doug are always on the search for friends and other couple's to hang out with.. Well, that is Keith and I to a tee. I guess as a kid they don't explain to you that making friends would be the hardest part of being an adult!
On the infertility home front, I had *that* dream the other night. You know, *that* dream where you experience your first positive pregnancy test. I remember feeling like my heart had stopped, and this overwhelming feeling of joy and excitement came over my body. It was amazing.. Then of course, my husband woke me up and started telling me about his zombie dreams. I was back in reality!! Oh god, the day that positive test appears in my hands will be the most glorious day in my entire life. And if god doesn't have that in the books for us, the day our adopted baby is in our hands will be just glorious.. One day our dream will become a reality, one day!!
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I know how you feel. When I was in that military lifestyle and living in Hawaii, I felt SO alone. My dog was my best friend for awhile. I did make friends with the boat girls, but it wasn't really close friendships. Luckily, I did happen to meet one girl who I've still really close with today. But I totally know how you feel! It's so hard to make friends when you move so much! And I found that it was especially hard when most of the other girls had kids! I felt so left out and not "part of the group." Hang in there, girl. I hope your BFP comes soon! xo It totally will be the best moment of your life :)
ReplyDeleteWish we lived closer to eachother (or even in the same country haha) I know the 4 of us would get along great :)
ReplyDeleteLove those dreams...although I truly believe it will be your reality soon...
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